Separated Parents and School Holidays: What if You Cannot Agree Child Arrangements?
For many separated parents, the school holidays can cause a headache, particularly when discussions with an ex-partner are impossible, messages are ignored, arrangements keep changing, or one parent refuses to agree to holiday contact or a trip abroad.
When parents cannot agree child arrangements, legal advice can help you understand what options are available, what is realistic, and how to protect the children from being caught in the middle. This article considers some common holiday disputes where separated parents may need help from a family solicitor.
When your ex-partner will not discuss holiday arrangements
Some parents find that every conversation about the holidays becomes an argument, while others receive no response at all. This can leave one parent unable to make plans, book time off work, arrange childcare or tell the children what will happen.
A family lawyer can help by setting out clear proposals in writing, narrowing the issues in dispute and advising whether a more formal route is needed. In some cases, this may involve mediation or other non-court dispute resolution methods, solicitor-led negotiation or, where absolutely necessary, an application to the family court for a child arrangements order.
When there is no clear agreement about holiday contact
Problems often arise between parents when arrangements have been informal for a long time. One parent may assume the usual term-time pattern continues, while the other expects extra time during the holidays. If there is no clear agreement, this can lead to last-minute disputes and uncertainty for the children.
Where agreement cannot be reached, a child arrangements order can set out who the children live with, when they spend time with each parent and how school holidays are divided. This can be particularly helpful where the same disputes arise every year or one parent does not stick to agreed arrangements.
When one parent wants to take the children abroad
Holidays abroad can be a common source of conflict after separation. A parent may be worried about the destination, the length of the trip, missing their own time with the children, or whether the children will be returned as planned.
A parent needs permission from everyone with parental responsibility before taking a child abroad, unless a court order says otherwise. If permission is refused and there is no court order in place then the parent who wants to travel abroad will need to ask the court for permission to do so. If there is a genuine concern about a child being taken abroad, particularly to a country that has travel risks, a parent may also need urgent advice about whether steps can be taken to prevent the trip.
These disputes can move quickly, particularly if flights have already been booked.
Specific issue and prohibited steps applications
Sometimes the dispute is about one specific question: can the children travel abroad, which dates should apply, should passports be handed over, or should a parent be stopped from taking a particular step? In those circumstances, the court may be asked to make a specific issue order or a prohibited steps order.
A specific issue order can decide a particular question about a child’s upbringing and are often applicable when dealing with the question of a holiday abroad or release of a passport etc. A prohibited steps order can prevent a parent from taking a step without the court’s permission. These orders can be important where holiday plans have become urgent, unclear or disputed.
However, it is important that you take advice as early as possible in these circumstances so that you and your lawyers, and if necessary the Court, have time to deal with the matter for you.
When communication is difficult, unsafe or simply not working
Not every separating couple can sit down and discuss arrangements calmly. There may be a history of controlling behaviour, high conflict, repeated broken promises or a complete breakdown in trust. In those situations, being told to “just agree it between yourselves” is not always possible.
A family lawyer can help manage communication in a more structured way. This may include writing to the other parent, advising on safe communication methods, setting out clear proposals, identifying any urgent risks and helping you decide whether court involvement is necessary. Of course, involving the court should always be a last resort for you and early advice can often prevent this.
How Couchman Hanson can help separated parents
Couchman Hanson’s experienced family lawyers advise separated parents on child arrangements, school holiday contact, disputes about taking children abroad, specific issue applications and prohibited steps applications and relocation cases. We provide clear, practical advice focused on resolving the immediate problem and protecting your child’s welfare.
If you cannot agree holiday arrangements with your ex-partner, are worried about a proposed holiday abroad, or need urgent advice about next steps, please contact Couchman Hanson. We offer a free 15-minute call to see how we can help.